How to Stay Ready

Yesterday I attended the Stay Ready Conference hosted by Eric Thomas & Associates. Attending personal growth conferences is one of my favorite things to do. And so many come through Houston which is a blessing! Similar to other conferences I’ve attended here are some of my key takeaways:

Be Who You Are

Willie Moore, Jr. graced the stage to tell us to be who we are which is a message I often spread as well. Willie says that you can’t be blessed while you’re pretending. If you pretend like you have it all together no one is going to reach out to help you. They think you don’t need any help. There’s opportunity that comes with being vulnerable so be who you are.

“I declare right now that you will win on purpose.” – Willie Moore, Jr.

Your Lineage is Counting on You

“If I don’t do what I’m supposed to do my lineage won’t be able to do what they’re destined to do.” – Inky Johnson

Inky Johnson said that our lineage is counting on us.  This thing is bigger than us. Other people down the line will build upon what we’ve done. Our lives will open or close doors for them.

In order to stay ready so that your lineage can be ready you have to keep the right perspective. Inky has experienced a lot in his life. He lived in a house where his uncles sold drugs. His mother worked at Wendy’s. He could have ended up in jail like his relatives. He could have worked a menial job. He could have lost it. He could have gave up, but his perspective has allowed him to persevere through even the biggest challenges.

He went to college when people told him that he wouldn’t. He made it to the NFL. Early in his career his arm was injured and paralyzed. Once again he could have thrown in the towel and lost all hope. But he persevered and now he has built a career inspiring people to be their best.

“If I can get the right perspective about the situation nine out of ten times I can beat the situation.” – Inky Johnson

Inky says that we have too many options. He tells the story of how he went to pick strawberries with his family. Some of his family members were like, “I’m not feeling this” and went back to the car. They gave up because they could. But our ancestors picking cotton couldn’t just walk away whenever they got ready. That option wasn’t available to them. But we have a plethora of options and we can exercise our right to give up whenever we get ready.

“Until it’s do or die you not really in it.” – Inky Johnson

Our ancestors only had two options – do or die. We’re not really in it – our goals, our future, our business, our marriages, etc. – until it is do or die. Inky says we have to approach it with everything we’ve got. That’s how you stay ready. “It’s the spirit of no option and no choice.” It’s simply do or die. There’s no retreating and no running.

“There’s no special talent. It’s grit.” – Inky Johnson

Not only is our lineage counting on us, but our ancestors are counting on us. “At what point do we honor the sacrifices of those who came before us?” Inky questioned. So many people have made sacrifices that we might be here. So many people didn’t give up on picking cotton that we might be here. They persevered. They prayed. And that perseverance and prayer made it possible for some of us to even be alive. So when do we honor them? When do our actions and decisions line up with the opportunity we’ve been given? It’s time that we take the platoon and run the next phase of the race before passing it on to our lineage.

“People burnout because they forget what they represent. The lineage.” – Inky Johnson

There’s so much more than I could say from Inky’s talk, but there were three other speakers. But I do want to end with a few notable quotes:

“If you’re foolish enough to have that type of faith God will put you right in front of it.”

“As long as you make sure someone else’s life is okay God will always make sure your life is okay.”

“Adversity makes some people break and some people break records.”

“Make the decision that you won’t be denied and you become dangerous.”

Know Where You Are

Jeremy Anderson took the stage next. He said that he didn’t ask for the opportunity to tour with Eric Thomas and Associates. Yet, at the same time he did. As he began to put the work in and do a little self reflection the call came to him. He asked for the opportunity with work and consistency.

“In order to get to the next level you have to know where you are.” – Jeremy Anderson

Jeremy says that sometimes the way we view ourselves is not the truth. He tells a story of how he thought someone had photoshopped a picture of him. In the picture his hairline was so far receded someone must have doctored it. His wife lovingly let him know the photo was legit. He decided it was time to go bald. Lol.

Our image of ourselves is sometimes not the reality. This can actually work both ways. Jeremy focused on how we are blinded to our shortcomings. There’s also a such thing as being blinded to our gifts as well. We must recognize who we really are and where we really are so that we can figure out where to go next and how to get there.

“Always grateful, but never settling.” – Jeremy Anderson

In order to grow we have to pull up all the negative stuff. Similar to gardening. We have to get rid of the weeds. But if you can’t even acknowledge the weeds in your own life and being you’re not going to be able to pull them up.

Jeremy says not to ask why the grass is greener on the other side. Ask what they are doing to make it greener. Are they fertilizing it? Watering it? Perhaps it’s even fake. You don’t need to know that the grass is greener. You need to know how to get your grass greener. You need to know what they’re doing.

At the same time focus on yourself. Be the best that you can be. Do what it takes to have greener grass. And be willing to look crazy for a while. Sometimes when you start pulling up the negative stuff you look and feel a mess. But that is only temporary. Being willing to temporarily look crazy will set you up for success.

“Be desperate to win and desperate to grow.” – Jeremy Anderson

How do you let go of the dead stuff? Tell yourself “I don’t do that no more.” Stop saying “I’m trying to quit.” Say you don’t do it anymore even if you’re still struggling with it. Jeremy used to do drugs and drink a lot. When he was quitting and people would ask him if he wanted to smoke a blunt he would reply, “I don’t do that no more.” Even though he really want to go smoke a blunt! And it worked for him. I forget the exact number but he’s been clean for years.

Some additional quotes from Jeremy:

“I told my wife I know how our story ends. It ends with us being rich…It ends with us being lenders and not borrowers.”

“Shaq’s feet look like they’re possessed by concrete. Are you willing to break your feet?”

“One day at a time. Today I choose to win.”

“People don’t buy dreams. They buy reality.”

“Don’t put too much power in your DNA. (As in my mom this or my dad this). Your DNA doesn’t determine your destiny. Your decisions do.”

Fear is a handicap

David Shands, CEO of Sleep Is 4 Suckers graced the stage next. I won’t spend a lot of time here because his talk was mostly business related and I don’t cover business training on my blog. The biggest takeaway for me even for non business owners was that fear is a handicap. He said it is a sickness. David brought up a website of phobias. I’m pretty sure that it was The Phobia List. There are hundreds of phobias on this website. There’s a fear of dancing (Chorophobia), a fear of responsibility, which explains some things, (Hypengyophobia) and a fear of telephones (Telephonophobia), to name a few.

When you look at it like that fear does really seem like a disability. If you have a phobia of responsibility can you see how that would disable you from living a life you love? So we have to be willing to get over our fears. He didn’t really go into details of the how, but identifying the problem is half the battle. According to David you have a disability. What is it? What fears are preventing you from staying ready?

Make it Happen

And finally the man of the hour, Eric Thomas himself hit the stage. His main message was we have to MAKE things happen. “Get ready to prepare to make oneself ready.” This means being proactive and not reactive. Eric says to measure how reactive you are in life vs. how proactive you are. He also says if you want to be a millionaire write down everything that millionaires do and do those things. That was an example, but essentially he’s saying that to be proactive and not reactive you find out what you need to do to be who you want to be and you do those things.

“Stop sitting by the phone.” – Eric Thomas

Make means to cause something to exist or come about that didn’t exist before. I am so of the philosophy of making things happen (as opposed to “manifesting” things). ET advises that we don’t need anything else than what we currently have to make it happen. You (and I) have enough right not.

“As soon as your brain can think it you are equipped to bring it about.” – Eric Thomas

Make the list of what you need to do and study that list. To get ready to stay ready for an opportunity starts with you. “Make sure every time you get the rock (ball) you score.” Operate at your highest level. Judge yourself before you judge (assess the people you’re around).

One thing ET said was that we have to take advantage of our present opportunities. We have to “knock them out right now”. Not just capitalizing on the opportunity, but being the person who can handle the opportunity. He tells how he almost got divorced. Not because he was cheating but because he didn’t know how to be a husband and his wife was ready to walk out. So many people want to change their decisions when things aren’t going right but you need to learn how to embrace your current opportunities. Not just trade them out for another. He said that some people are praying for a spouse (ME!) and a career while others have those opportunities but don’t fully embrace them.

If the current situation you’re in doesn’t work out it doesn’t relieve you of your need to grow. “If you break up with her you still have to be a husband.” So you might as well knock it out now. You might as well learn how to be a husband right now in this current marriage. No matter what you will still have to grow into a husband or a wife or a parent or a business owner or a more joyful person or a more disciplined person, etc. Running away doesn’t change it. Change changes it.

Some closing quotes from ET:

“You are no deeper than the people you run with.”

“Most of you can’t stay ready because you’re focused on the past. Let that go.”

Related Articles:

Tony Robbins’ How to Unleash the Power Within

Jack Canfield’s Getting to Great in One Day

Mary Morrissey’s DreamBuilder

Tony Gaskins Jr.’s Live A Balanced Life

Lessons From the Law of Attraction with Esther Hicks

Breakthroughs Out Loud From Lisa Nichols & Team


FCTB023: You Are Meant To Transform (How A Caterpillar Becomes A Butterfly)

Today’s episode embodies everything that I stand for – this podcast and blog, my commitment to continuous growth and transformation, my calling as a coach, and my own experiences as a person.

The caterpillar is a very good reminder that we are not supposed to stay the same and we are meant to grow in every aspect of our lives. If you’ve been following the podcast, you’d know that I have gone through a transformation which prompted me to take this path where I guide other women towards their growth and transformation towards the best version of themselves.

It is that process, or life cycle, that I would like to zero-in on in this episode, where I talked about:

  • How an unfulfilled job and unhappy life became the trigger that led me to real estate investing, wealth building and personal growth (1:40).
  • How real estate investing built me up then let me down, and how that ride gave me the biggest epiphany in life through a mug in a bookstore (3:25).
  • Memories from childhood and growing up that drove me to be cautious and not want to be seen (5:25).
  • How self-reflection, investing in self-growth and being real to myself changed me and led me to where I am today (8:17).
  • The butterflies’ literal and metaphorical life cycle starting from birth / being eggs (12:34).
  • Why caterpillars need to eat, grow and shed, and what these 3 key biological functions represent in the human experience (12:53).
  • The importance of finding a secure spot to grow during the cocoon stage, and how personal growth events and coaching provide this sense of security (17:01).
  • How the caterpillar knows and realizes that it’s time to go into the cocoon (18:09).
  • The process of metamorphosis where caterpillars go through a physical transformation to becoming butterflies, and how this change is manifested in people (20:40).
  • What are tell-tale signs signifying that a person is afraid of growth (24:12).
  • My modern parable of the dead caterpillars (25:16).

We are all caterpillars, and we might not know we’re meant to become butterflies – to be so much more than we are. We go through life not knowing what’s in store for us, but it is up to us to listen to our hearts and our instincts and be ready for growth when the signals are prompting you.

I want to hear from you. Which part of the butterfly life cycle are you in? What are you taking action on now? Send me an email at charlene@fromcaterpillarstobutterflies.com or share your feedback in the comments section.

You can find the show on iTunes, Soundcloud, Stitcher, GooglePlay, and Podbean. You can also subscribe to the podcast via Patreon and receive bonus content, first dibs to episodes, discounts, and perks. Remember to leave the podcast a rating and review on the platform you’re listening to. This allows us to reach more people and move up the rankings. If what you listened to today has been useful for you, feel free to share it with other too.

Thank you for taking the time to listen, and I appreciate all your support. Until next time!

 


You Can’t Be Suspicious of Success and Achieve Success

dont-be-suspicious-of-success

Several years ago a famous entertainer lost a lot of weight on a weight loss program. Don’t quote me but I believe she went from a size 20 to a size 2. At the time, a lot of people were saying she didn’t lose it naturally. Her own effort didn’t lead to her successful weight loss. Transforming her eating and exercise habits wasn’t the thing that did it. No, she must have taken the easy way out. I constantly heard things like:

“She must have had surgery.”

“She had lipo.”

“Her stomach was stapled.”

People were suspicious of her weight loss journey. They didn’t believe she was able to transform her body with diet and exercise. Here’s the thing: if you don’t think it’s possible to lose a ton of weight with diet and exercise guess what you’re never going to do? You’re never going to lose weight with diet and exercise. You won’t even try. If you do try you will quit at the first sign of (temporary) defeat.

You will say to yourself, “You see? I knew it wasn’t possible.”

You can’t do what you don’t believe is possible. You have to believe in success. Whether it’s weight loss success, career success, marriage success, etc.

Believe in something.

I know a lot of people are faking it until they make it. That may be why we as a society are so hesitant to trust and believe. Yet the resistance is costing us our own success. We are preventing our own transformation.

I’m not saying to trust and believe in everyone’s journey.  I am saying to find someone you can believe. Find someone you can model your own transformation after. Find a success story you can trust and believe in so that it can fuel your own success.

You can’t be suspicious of success and expect to achieve your own level of success. You can’t be suspicious of wealth and expect to generate wealth for yourself. You can’t be suspicious of weight loss and expect to lose weight.

Are your suspicions of other people’s success holding you back? Are you using those suspicions to let yourself off the hook? Are you giving yourself permission to not even try because it’s not possible anyway?

I challenge you to let yourself believe in someone else’s success story. Let it fuel you and inspire you. When you find yourself doubting someone else’s success story take a step back and accept the possibility that it could be true. And if it is true for them it can also be true for you.

If you no longer want your success suspicions to hold you back I can help. As I coach I help people just like you let go of what’s holding them back so that they can create the life of their dreams. If this is you, I invite you to apply for a complimentary strategy session with me at www.transformwithcharlene.com.


Frequently Asked Questions About Investing In A Life Coach

you can do anything

Do I need a life coach?

Short answer: Yes.

Long answer: Coaches help you get from where you are to where you want to be. It sounds cliche but it’s true. It’s not uncommon to receive support and guidance from another person. People generally work with life coaches specifically because:

  • They feel unfulfilled and want more out of life – Do you ever think to yourself, “I feel unfulfilled”? Working with a coach could help you identify exactly what’s missing, why it’s missing, and how to get it.
  • They feel out of balance – With all the roles people play with competing goals it’s easy to get out of balance. Working with a coach can help you create a balance in your life based on your priorities, values and goals. Your coach can also hold you accountable to your new balance structure.
  • They don’t know who they are – This person asks themselves, “Who am I?” They have lost sense of who they are and what they want. They have a hard time finding their place in the world. They don’t “fit in” with their current surroundings. Or they lack congruence in what they say, believe, and do. They may have gone through a major transition such as a marriage, divorce, empty nester, etc. They may have been subject to a bully at home or at work which has left them insecure and lost. Most people never take the time to really dig deep into who they are. It shows in the life they live and the things they settle for.
  • They have a major decision that troubles them – This was me. I was in a relationship that didn’t feel right. On the surface I couldn’t tell if it was me bringing baggage from a previous relationship into that relationship or if it was him. Talking with my coach helped me sort out my thoughts, my feelings, and my needs. I was able to think clearly about what I was experiencing and decide if that was the right relationship for me. A lot of times we harbor so much responsibility for things that we shouldn’t. We think that it must be us so we’re reluctant to make the decisions that we need to make in order to create our own happiness. (BTW – it was him 😉 )
  • They have big goals – One of the biggest benefits of having a coach (whether it’s business, life, health, etc.) is the accountability factor. Generally, when you make a commitment to another person you keep it. When you make a commitment to yourself a lot of times you don’t keep it. Let’s just be honest. When you know you have to report to someone else you’re likelihood of following through increases. In fact, research shows that your likelihood of accomplishing a goal increases to 95% when you have a scheduled appointment with your accountability partner or coach. How would you like to accomplish 95% of your goals?

What is a life coach?

A life coach is a professional who works with you to accomplish certain goals in your life and overcome challenges standing in your way. They are trained with a variety of tools and techniques to help their clients create their desired results for their life. Coaches may have a certain specialty such as relationship coaching or parenting coaching.

Why is working with a life coach valuable?

A lot of people are living unfulfilling lives that lack purpose. They have been in this cycle of “nothingness” for years. I talk to women all the time who say they have felt unfulfilled for years. Why is that? Working with a coach can help you break the negative cycles in your life. Whether that be the cycle of living an unfulfilling, uninspiring life year after year despite making a resolution to change every January or the cycle of constantly sabotaging your dreams and your relationships. A coach can help you get out of your own way and finally move forward.

Coaches provide outside perspective. They call you out when you need to be called out. They stretch you. They help you to get out of your head or out of your emotions so that you can make the best decision for you, your family, and your future. A good coach holds the vision you have for your life for you. She will hold you to your values when you are relaxing them. A coach is on your side. No, scratch that. A coach is on the side of your vision, your values, and your authentic self. She stands for those things even when you’re not.

What’s the difference between therapy and life coaching?

Therapy generally focuses on the past. Life coaching focuses on the future. Therapy asks, “How did you get here?” Life coaching ask, “Where are you going?” Therapy focuses a great deal on emotionally healing. Life coaching focuses on mastering your mindset. Therapy often serves as a release of thoughts and feeling related to an experience(s). Coaching focuses on the solution or best next step as it relates to the experience.  Both will help you improve your life.

How does life coaching work?

Depending on the coach your first interaction with them may be a clarity or strategy session. The main purpose of this session is to help understand what the potential client’s situation is so that the coach can ascertain if they can help them. There’s no reason to take someone’s investment if you can’t actually help them. During this call, the potential client will also be able to decide if they want to partner with that particular coach on their goals.

Once there is a mutual decision to move forward you will likely receive a welcome packet with an agreement spelling out the terms of your relationship, an initial client intake form, an onboarding questionnaire to define your goals and objectives, and details on how to schedule your first session. The first session is generally the longest and can last up to 2 – 3 hours. This is where the coach will review your welcome packet materials with you, dive deeper into what you most want to accomplish during your time together, and map out how you will work together to accomplish your goals and what to expect in general.

After your first session you will meet with your coach with regularity. This may be weekly or biweekly. The sessions may last 30 minutes to an hour. Most likely you will meet via phone, but you could also meet in person with your coach. Each session will be geared towards helping you achieve your goal. Depending on the coaching program your coach may set the general theme for each session. Other times you may set the theme for the session. For example, in my Rediscover You 12 week private intensive I take women through a journey to getting back to their authentic self. In my Transform Your Life 12 week private intensive the client sets the agenda (with my support) based on the transformation they’d like to see.

Your coach will likely have assignments and exercises for you to complete in between sessions. This may be to help you overcome a mental block you are experiencing. It may be to help you identify what’s the right balance to seek in your life (see the Life Balance Wheel). It may be to help you get super clear on what you really want.  Your coach may also send you additional resources as they see fit.

Meeting with your coach regularly helps to ensure you are making progress.

How many sessions do I need to see results?

It depends on your particular situation. I generally recommend working with your coach for at least three months to see the most transformation. It’s similar to your health. You wouldn’t work out one day and expect to lose weight. However, I do offer packages with as little as three sessions.

Do I really need a life coach?

Yes! Some of the most successful people in the world have a coach. Top coaches earn a million dollars per client. Yes, some people believe in the power of coaching so much they are willing to invest a million dollars.

Luckily, the investment to partner with me on the change you want to create in your life is not a million dollars (yet). To apply for a complimentary Rediscover You clarity session with me go to www.transformwithcharlene.com.

Additional Resources:

7 Powerful Stories of How Life Coaching Changes Lives

19 Life Changing Lessons From Amazing Life Coaches

26 Things Your Life Coach Would Tell You (if you had one)

One-On-One Life Coaching With Charlene

Video: Coaching – Take Your Life From Good to Great

 


Stop Valuing Money Over Your Dreams

I work with women who want more out of life. Somehow they got lost in the shuffle of life. They’ve lost sense of who they are. Or they have high hopes for life and are ready to finally go for it. I had an exploratory call with a woman recently. She has really ambitious goals for her life. She was having a hard time getting focused and being productive. We discussed potentially working together. She needed some time to think about it. We scheduled a time to check back in and move forward if that was her decision. At 12 am in the morning the day we were scheduled to touch base she sends me an email. She says that she and her husband are going to sit down and create a strategy for achieving her goals.

That’s a great concept. I totally get it. I “try” to do things on my own at first some times as well. But who am I kidding? If I couldn’t do it on my own this far what makes me think I will magically be able to do it on my own?

Her and her husband are probably not going to sit down to do anything!

I don’t say that to insult her. I’m not trying to call her out. I honor her. I respect her and I believe we would work well together. That’s why I shared with her my program. It was a win-win. I don’t offer my services to everyone I meet. I believe in her vision.

I know from experience, thinking that we are going to magically be able to accomplish something on our own that has eluded us this far is one of the ways we sabotage ourselves. We are going around in circles, pretending like we’re making progress. It’s a way we give ourselves permission to play it safe. We give ourselves permission to procastinate.

If you have goals and procrastination, you have nothing. If you have goals and you take action, you will have anything you want.” – Thomas J. Vilord

What it boils down to is that we value money more than we value transformation. Money is tangible. I can see it, touch it, feel it and count it. How do I count my transformation?

Holding on to our money is a false sense of security. Your real security is in your ability to consistently grow.

Without continual growth and progress, such words as improvement, achievement, and success have no meaning. – Benjamin Franklin

We think that our money is like our virginity. We think once it’s gone it never comes back. But that’s not true! It always comes back.

A few years ago I purchased a rental house that went way over budget. I emptied my savings account. I maxed out my credit cards. I took money out of my 401(k). This house went way over budget and you know what? I survived.  I wasn’t eating Ramen Noodles. My financial needs continued to be met. Life went on. Now I have an additional property added to my portfolio with positive monthly cash flow and equity. If I was too afraid of losing my money I wouldn’t have that.

What I learned from that experience is that money always comes back. It’s the cycle of life.

You spend money.

You earn money.

You give money.

You receive money.

It always comes back. I have accepted that I have to let the money go when it wants to go so that it can come when I want it to come.

It’s worth it to me to invest my money for the opportunity to change my life and my wealth. Is it worth it to you?

I believe that when you are climbing the mountain that is your highest vision and you reach the top you will see bigger, better, more magical, more fulfilling mountains you can also climb. However, if you never start the journey up the first mountain you will never see the others. As long as you stay at the foot of the mountain you can’t see all that is available to you. When you pass up on one opportunity to change your life you are inevitably passing up every other opportunity that would have been revealed to you in due time.

“Yet knowing how way leads on to way, I doubted if I should ever come back.” – Robert Frost

Way leads on to way. Dream leads on to dream. Vision leads on to vision. Progress leads on to more progress.

Standing still does not lead on to way. Circling the mountain does not lead on to way. Thinking and planning without acting does not lead on to progress or dreams or visions.

No. Way leads on to way.

If something has the opportunity to change your life you should go for it NOW. A lot of times we fear losing our money more than we fear losing our dreams. So we keep our money and lose our dreams. We kid ourselves into thinking that we will accomplish our goals on our own. Yet, we rarely do. So we lose our dreams forever at worst. Or we delay them two, ten, twenty years at best.

Your money will come back to you. It’s just the cycle of life. Will your dreams come back to you?

Hold onto dreams for if dreams die life is like a broken-winged bird that cannot fly.” – Langston Hughes

Give yourself a chance for once. Stop giving your bank account a chance to look good. Give yourself a chance to look and feel good. Give yourself a chance to be who you’ve always wanted to be and to live the life you’ve always wanted to live.

Value the transformation more than you value the money. Have more faith in your vision than in your money. That’s how you change your life. That’s how way leads on to way.

If you’re ready to start the journey towards your own personal transformation, I invite you to apply for a complimentary, private clarity call with me. Apply at www.transformwithcharlene.com.

 

 


60 Affirmations to Transform Your Life

Tranformation

When you’re ready to transform your life you need an arsenal of positive beliefs to help you. I’ve compiled some of my favorite Transform Your Life Affirmations. When you transform your thoughts, beliefs, and habits you can transform your life and everything in it. What’s your favorite transformation affirmation? Write it down. Carry it with you. Say it to yourself as much as possible and watch your life transform before your eyes.

50 Transformation Affirmations

  1. I co-create my life with God.
  2. I am getting better and better everyday in every way.
  3. I direct my future.
  4. I am the captain of my faith and the master of my soul.
  5. I am a powerful person with the ability to create the transformation I most want in my life.
  6. I choose what life I want.
  7. I am empowered to create a life I love.
  8. My future is in my hands.
  9. I take advantage of all the opportunities surrounding me.
  10. My potential is limitless.
  11. Better things are always coming to me.
  12. Love and blessings are chasing me down.
  13. I have a bright future ahead of me.
  14. I can do anything I set my mind to.
  15. Nothing is impossible for me.
  16. I deserve the best that life has to offer.
  17. Life supports me and my dreams.
  18. I can always make a new. better decision for my life.
  19. I enjoy the journey of life.
  20. I forgive myself and my past.
  21. I release all negative energy, strongholds, and shameful feelings holding me back.
  22. I make the best decisions I can with the information I have.
  23. I love myself enough to live my best life.
  24. My ideal life is waiting for me.
  25. I always pursue my ideas.
  26. I work on my goals everyday.
  27. I move forward in spite of setbacks.
  28. Nothing I desire is held back from me.
  29. I am consistent, determined, and focused.
  30. I give my all in whatever I do.
  31. I speak positively over my life.
  32. I think positive thoughts.
  33. I am a good person who deserves good things.
  34. I am a giver and life gives to me.
  35. I am capable of creating something out of nothing.
  36. My dreams are important and worth pursing.
  37. Like the caterpillar I am not meant to stay the way I am forever.
  38. My life has purpose.
  39. My dreams are purposeful, not accidental.
  40. I am fulfilling my purpose for all the people who need me.
  41. I am fulfilling my purpose for all the people who are watching me.
  42. My dreams are not just for me.
  43. I only pursue the highest vision I have for my life.
  44. I am turning over a new leaf because I can and I choose to.
  45. I am making a new decision for my future despite the decisions I made in my past.
  46. I am transforming my life day by day.
  47. It’s never too late to correct my mistakes.
  48. I am courageous enough to change my life.
  49. I embrace growth opportunities.
  50. I am grateful for the life I have while I earnestly pursue the life I desire.

Transformation Affirmations Inspired by the Bible

  1. I am transformed by the renewing of my mind. (Romans 12:2)
  2. My latter days are better than my former days. (Job 8:7)
  3. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. (Philippians 4:13)
  4. I make myself a new heart and a new spirit. (Ezekiel 18:31)
  5. I am a new woman. (2 Corinthians 5:17)
  6. I have hope and a future waiting for me. (Jeremiah 29:11)
  7. My vision is for the appointed time and shall not be late. (Habakkuk 2:3)
  8. There is a time and a season for my dreams. (Ecclesiastes 3:1)
  9. My steps are ordered by the Lord. (Psalms 37:23)
  10. My plans will succeed when I commit them to God. (Proverbs 16:3)

 

 


VIDEO: There’s Purpose in Your Season

There is purpose in your season. Embrace where you are. Don’t mourn what’s gone. Trust the process.

It’s easy to get discouraged about where you are and where you thought you’d be. Sometimes we want to skip seasons in our life and just jump to the “good” part; the butterfly part.

But there’s purpose in every season. One season prepares you for the next. You may not ever know it, but it does. Sometimes you will be able to recognize and pinpoint the purpose in an earlier season of your life. You will know that it prepared you for such a time as this. Other times you won’t, but understand that it wasn’t for nothing. It never is.

I recorded the video above to discuss the purpose in our seasons. Just like there’s purpose in every stage of the butterfly’s life, there’s purpose in every stage of our life. If we just trust God and ourselves we’ll get to where we need to be. Everything along the way is just a gift.

Take the 7 Day Challenge, The Butterfly Effect –> www.fromcaterpillarstobutterflies.com/thebutterflyeffect


How to Unleash the Power Within

Tony Robbins

 

I spent four days in Dallas at Tony Robbin’s Unleash the Power Within seminar. It is utterly amazing and I can’t wait to go again. There’s really something life changing about being immersed in environments that push you to be the person you’ve really been all along. I absolutely love these types of events. I’m still reeling off of the experience I had. In this post, I want to share some of the insights I gained at the event.

Tony’s Wisdom: My past does not equal my future.

I truly believe a lot of people aren’t living their best life, because they’re living their worst past. All the things they should not have done or should have done. They are living their mistakes. They are living other people’s mistakes. They are living events that are long gone except in their own memories. I know some people have been through unimaginable things. I don’t mean to disregard those experiences. But the fact of the matter is – when you let go of what’s in your hand (head, heart) you can grab hold of something new.

Tony says, “The only reason you don’t have what you want is the because of the story you keep telling yourself about why you don’t have it.” That story was created some time ago and was most likely created as a result of something that happened. Maybe someone told you something about yourself. (You’re stupid). Maybe you witnessed something happening. Maybe you did something yourself. As a result you told yourself a story about why that happened and you’ve been living by that story ever since.

Charlene’s Take: At any given moment I get to decide what I want and that decision doesn’t have to be related to any other decision I’ve made before this moment.

Tony’s Wisdom: The number 1 ingredient to achievement is hunger that doesn’t go away.

Ask yourself, “What does life on my terms look like?” “What do I really want?” “What do I want more of?” “What do I want less of?” In order to create a life on your terms you must master the science (not art) of achievement. The science of achievement means that success leaves clues. If you want to achieve something in particular find someone who has already achieved it and follow their clues.

Charlene’s Take: Never get comfortable. Never get distracted. Never get full.

Tony’s Wisdom: Fear is holding you back.

It’s not your lack of resources or creativity. It’s not your past or your parents. It’s not where you live or where you’re from. It’s fear. We’re afraid of primarily one thing – not being enough. We fear if we’re not enough we won’t be loved. This fear has the capacity to control our lives and at times it does. We mistakenly believe we’re afraid of success or failure or judgment. Ultimately, we afraid of not being enough. We can never eliminate the fear completely. We can minimize the impact it has on our life. We have to learn to “dance with fear.”

Charlene’s Take: I am enough and I always will be. (So are you!)

Tony’s Wisdom: You do not plateau in this life.

You are either growing or dying. If your relationship isn’t growing, it’s dying. If your business isn’t growing, it’s dying. If you aren’t growing, you’re dying.

Charlene’s Take: There’s no such thing as standing still. If you think you’re standing still you’re falling backwards.

Tony’s Wisdom: Take massive action

Not just a little bit of action. Massive action. Don’t just do what you’re told to do. Do more. If you’re at the gym and your trainer tells you to do 10 reps, do 12. Don’t go after things like everyone else does. Don’t be good at it. Be a mastery at it.

When I was in college (Florida A& M – go rattlers!) we had this saying, “To be early is to be on time. To be on time is to be late. To be late is unacceptable.” As I think about taking massive action and mastering it I think about another version of this saying. “To do outstanding work is to be on par. To be on par is to be below average. To be below average is unacceptable.”

Charlene’s Take: “Don’t let good get in the way of great.”

Tony’s Wisdom: Celebrate

If you’re on track celebrate. If you’re off track celebrate. Celebrate the fact that you noticed you were off course and are able to course correct.

Tony’s Wisdom: When you’re off course change your approach not your goals.

You can change your strategy, your delivery, your tactics, your actions, your schedule or anything else. Just don’t change your goals. If this is really what you want why should you change it? Unless you don’t really want it.

Charlene’s Take: I am so glad this was said.

I see it all the time as I network with other entrepreneurs. When they’re off course they change their entire business model. I always tell them something I heard long ago, “You cannot hit a moving target.”

Tony’s Wisdom: All progress comes from breaking patterns.

Don’t “should” all over yourself. I should do this. I should do that. Learn to interrupt your patterns so that you can progress in your life. If you are struggling in your relationship with someone else leverage this knowledge. Break their patterns. One example Tony gave was making someone laugh when they’re angry. Or asking a question that’s unrelated when someone is going off on a rant.

Charlene’s Take: Change your habits (patterns) change your life.

Tony’s Wisdom: Proximity is power.

Find a peer group that plays the game of life much higher than you or at least on the same level. Find a team that will challenge you, not just accept you. If you associate with people who are playing lower than you and not challenging you, you will be the one who changes (decreases) to match their level. It’s the law of the lowest common denominator.

Charlene’s Take: I don’t know who originally said this but, “Don’t be the smartest person in the room.”

Tony’s Wisdom: Learn how to adjust incrementally. 2 mm.

The 2 mm rule says that subtle changes can lead to massive improvements. There’s a plastic surgeon who gets paid millions of dollars just by moving facial features 2 mm. A 2 mm shift in someone’s eyes or lips can make their face “beautiful”. A 2 mm shift in golf can win the game. 2 mm shifts are all that’s needed a lot of times.

Charlene’s Take: You don’t have to have the next big idea to transform your life or business.

Small adjustments can be game changing. It’s similar to the butterfly effect. A butterfly flapping its wings can cause a tornado in another part of the country. What is your 2 mm shift capable of accomplishing?

Tony’s Wisdom: Training never stops when you want an extraordinary life.

Get a coach to hold you accountable and give you ongoing feedback. For the record, Tony Robbins has 3 coaches. You need someone who is not going to let you off the hook. You don’t need someone who will tell you what to do. When you’re making excuses and not following through you need someone who says, “F- you. Get up!” (Tony’s words. Not mine).

Go to self improvement events at least twice a year (every six months). Read and listen to inspiring, transformational content EVERYDAY. Read something with strategy, philosophy, instructions that can create a greater quality of life every month.

Charlene’s Take: If you want to transform some aspect of your life and you have yet to do it on your own thus far, it’s time to invest in a coach.

I still have pages of notes from the event, but I will stop here from now. If you take just a few of these lessons and apply them to your life you will undoubtedly see the power within you start to unleash. If you want to explore partnering with a coach to help you transform the life you have into the life you want I invite you to sign up for a complimentary Transform Your Life clarity session with me. Sign up at www.transformwithcharlene.com.


7 Powerful Stories of How Life Coaching Transforms Lives

Accomplish your dreams, discover the real you, love yourself, transform your live.

Accomplish your dreams, discover the real you, love yourself, transform your live.

Kerry Washington has a great quote that I love. She says, “My brain and my heart are really important to me. I don’t know why I wouldn’t seek help to have those things be as healthy as my teeth. I go to the dentist. So why wouldn’t I go to a shrink?”

Understand, seeing a shrink (or therapist) is not the same as working with a life coach. Therapists focus on the past and how you’ve gotten to this point in your life. Life coaches focus on where you are now, where you want to be and how to get there.  Even as a life coach I love that quote. The concept is the same. I take care of my teeth. I take care of my body. I join 30 day squat and smoothies challenges. I want to snatch my waist. Why shouldn’t I take care of my future, my vision? Why shouldn’t I “snatch” my life?

Life Coaching changes lives. I know this for a fact. It’s still a new concept. Most people have never considered partnering with a professional on their goals, but a lot of successful people routinely invest in coaches.  If you’ve never considered investing in a life coach of your own these powerful stories will make you reconsider. Hear from 7 real people who achieved real results through the power of coaching.

Tools to deal with life

“I know I won’t see Cathy for more than a few months, but the time spent with her is building the foundation for a healthier life.

I’ve learned to value my thoughts and work, and trust my intuition rather than ignore it. Cathy taught me that I already have all the answers to my problems, and I simply have to listen to find a solution. Using positive affirmations and daily writing exercises, my anxiety levels have dropped. I feel that after leaving Cathy, I’ll have the proper tools to deal with stress.”  – IT HAPPENED TO ME: A Life Coach Actually Changed My Life

Abundance, joy, and fulfillment

“…working with a life coach isn’t just a nice-to-have. For me, and for just about every highly successful person I know, it’s an essential. It keeps us thinking big and moving that vision forward…I actually transformed every aspect of my life in those ten months and set out on a path that would bring me much abundance, joy, and fulfillment…” – Why I Happily Pay my Life Coach the Big Bucks

Happier Career

“My brother and dad had both seen a life coach named David whom they loved. They cautioned that he was eccentric, but great…He didn’t encourage me to stay or to go, he simply helped me to isolate the essential issues and gave me some questions to think about….That was over three years ago, and I am happier at my job now than I have ever been.” – My Visit to a Life Coach

Calmness and Happiness

“In the months since I finished my sessions with Yatros, I passed my one-year anniversary of being back in New York. My career has stabilized (by freelance standards), I’m finding time to see my friends, and my boyfriend and I are moving in together. I’m calmer and happier than I’ve been since I can remember.” – I Hired a Millennial Life Coach

Personal Integrity

“I gave my husband back massages; we had more sex than we’d had in a long time; my son started to recognize the right way to hold his board books; my daughter seemed to be whining less. The cloud of happiness and self-confidence gathering under my feet, Gerber said, was the result of living in “personal integrity.”…But I’m so grateful to have a blueprint for redirecting my energies in a productive direction, to know that following it calms and comforts me. Especially when you’re in a crisis, when everything seems dire and impossible, the promises are like a path to safety. The action-oriented approach has also taken root in ways that seem irrevocable.” – Life Coaching: Better than Therapy?

Take Control

I’m getting stronger and better everyday. Women are conditioned to be caretakers. We struggle to see our contribution as something to be compensated for rather than just appreciated.” – HOW A LIFE COACH TAUGHT ME TO TAKE CONTROL OF MY WORTH

Concrete Steps

“I didn’t walk away suddenly feeling cured or awakened. Instead, I had lists of concrete steps and actions to do in reaction to whatever my brain was fixated on…overall, I’m happy with where I am.” – 3 Things I Learned from My Life Coach

Want to learn more about how life coaching can transform your life?  Schedule a complimentary, private Transform Your Life Clarity session with me.

Transform Your Life Clarity Call

Additional Resources:

Frequently Asked Questions About Investing in A Life Coach

19 Life Changing Lessons From Amazing Life Coaches

26 Things Your Life Coach Would Tell You (if you had one)

One-On-One Life Coaching With Charlene

Video: Coaching – Take Your Life From Good to Great


19 Life Changing Lessons from Amazing Life Coaches

Life Changing

There’s no shortage of amazing life coaches to help us transform the way we live our lives. We know them, we love them and we trust their wisdom. I’ve compiled a list of 19 transformation, life-changing quotes from life coaches I simply adore. There’s no special order. Enjoy!

1. Don’t worry about what you don’t know

“Do you ever find yourself with a genius idea, but paralyzed by thought “Yeah, but I don’t know how to do that…” Here’s the deal. 99% of what you need to do to grow your business or grow your life requires you do something you’ve never done before. It’s the beautiful common denominator of self-evolution.
That’s why everything is figure-outable is my default mantra. If I don’t know how to do something, I’m pretty sure there’s someone else on the planet who does.” – Marie Forleo

2. Dive deeply into the person you want to be

“Don’t dance around the perimeter of the person you want to be. Dive deeply and fully into it.” – Gabrielle Bernstein

3. When you long for something better have faith in that longing

“We sense love, but we don’t believe in it. We save our faith for fear. But ultimately, there is a quiet voice in each of us that longs for something better.” – Gabrielle Bernstein

4. Taking action = decision. Not taking action = no decision.

“A real decision is measured by the fact that you’ve taken a new action. If there’s no action, you haven’t truly decided.” – Tony Robbins

5. Your life can be a masterpiece

“I challenge you to make your life a masterpiece. I challenge you to join the ranks of those people who live what they teach, who walk their talk.” – Tony Robbins

6. Use your beliefs to empower you

“Beliefs have the power to create and the power to destroy. Human beings have the awesome ability to take any experience of their lives and create a meaning that disempowers them or one that can literally save their lives.” – Tony Robbins

7. Promising just isn’t good enough

“The road of life is strewn with the bodies of promising people. People who show promise, yet lack the confidence to act. People who make promises they are unable to keep. People who promise to do tomorrow what they could do today. Promising young stars, athletes, entrepreneurs who wait for promises to come true. Promise without a goal and a plan is like a barren cow. You know what she could do if she could do it, but she can’t. Turn your promise into a plan. Make no promise for tomorrow if you are able to keep it today. And if someone calls you promising, know that you are not doing enough today.” ― Iyanla Vanzant

8. Always take a chance

“If you are afraid to take a chance, take one anyway. What you don’t do can create the same regrets as the mistakes you make.” ― Iyanla Vanzant

9. Invest in your inside – your heart, your mindset, your vision

“So many of us invest a fortune making ourselves look good to the world, yet inside we are falling apart. It’s time to invest on the inside.” ― Iyanla Vanzant

10. Align your life with your gifts and you will be successful

“God made no mistakes when He created you. You were uniquely designed for success in your purpose. When you align your life with your strengths—those innate qualities you were gifted with—you will tap into a level of grace that empowers you to achieve things you could never accomplish in your strength alone.” ― Valorie Burton

11. Fight for what you see in your future. Fight for the vision to come to pass.

“God gives you the sight, the right, and the might to do great things, but you have to develop the fight!” ― Tim Storey

12. #BeReallyYou – it’s an amazing adventure

“You will have to fight for your comeback, but you have the three Members of the Godhead leading you, supporting you, and supernaturally enabling you in that fight…. Getting past your faults and weaknesses is the biggest fight you will take on, but the victories are sweeter than anything you can imagine. Fighting for your comeback is fighting to be who you were created to be, and becoming “yourself” is an amazing adventure.” ― Tim Storey

13. Try. Fail. Learn. Try again.

“Fact: From quitting smoking to skiing, we succeed to the degree we try, fail, and learn. Studies show that people who worry about mistakes shut down, but those who are relaxed about doing badly soon learn to do well. Success is built on failure.” – Martha Beck

14. Clarity = transformation

“When your clarity meets your conviction and you apply action to the equation, your world will begin to transform before your eyes.” ― Lisa Nichols

15. You don’t need permission to #BeReallyYou

“I am no longer asking for permission to be me. I’m giving notice.” – Lisa Nichols

16. You don’t have to know the specifics in order to take a step

“You don’t always have to know exactly what you’re doing or where you’re going. You just have to be willing to take the next step. Sometimes clear and powerful. Sometimes with blind unwavering faith.”  – Lisa Nichols

17. Inaction gets you nowhere

“We’re all ignorant in one way or another. There are things we simply don’t know, what we don’t know. When it comes to action, more than likely you know what to do, you’re just stopping yourself from doing it because you don’t know what exact actions will get you the results you want. However, the one thing I guarantee won’t get the results you want is INACTION.” – Sean Smith

I’m going to throw myself in here. Hey, I think I’m pretty amazing!

18. Rewrite your life script

“Sometimes we get stuck in the same script, different cast lifestyle. The people and places may change, but the script we’re living by doesn’t. As a result, we never create the transformation in our lives we’ve been yearning for. We have to be brave enough to pull out our red ink pen and mark up, scratch out, rewrite our life script. Until then, we will say stuck in chaos, unfulfillment, and dissatisfaction.” – Charlene Dior

19. Mediocrity on a platter is still mediocrity

“Life and the people it will at times attempt to serve you mediocrity on a platter. Because it’s dressed up you might be inclined to take it. If you don’t people may resort to saying (and believing) you are ungrateful or greedy. They might not even know for themselves that what they have offered to you is mediocre at best so don’t despise them. Simple thank life or whomever for the gesture and wait for something amazing.” – Charlene Dior

If you’re interested in leveraging the power of coaching in your life check out 4 Ways to Coach Yourself to Success. Looking for a coach to shift the trajectory of your life? Are you ready for something more? Sign up for a no cost Transform Your Life Coaching session with me.

 Transform Your Life Clarity Call

Additional Resources:

Frequently Asked Questions About Investing in A Life Coach

7 Powerful Stories of How Life Coaching Changes Lives

26 Things Your Life Coach Would Tell You (if you had one)

One-On-One Life Coaching With Charlene

Video: Coaching – Take Your Life From Good to Great