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There’s been a lot of talk about power lately in my life. A few weeks ago, I was in an event with Courtney Sanders of Think and Grow Chick and a Facebook Live with Renee Lamb on Power Poses.
I decided that I should share with you, my followers, how to be powerful. As a prelude, I want to stress that I fully encourage purposefully and strategically creating our own opportunities and set ourselves to be successful. But these must be done within bounds – not resorting to manipulating or conniving with our relationships. I also support emulating other people’s strategies towards success. But it must be applied through the foundation of authenticity to one’s self and treating lessons from coaches and mentors as reinforcement instead of a panacea to our challenges.
I have created a 7-point guide on the principles on what it takes to be powerful, together with some anecdotes that I discussed.
Know who you are. You’ll never be powerful living misaligned to who you truly are. Knowing who you are also entails that your thoughts and beliefs are congruent with your actions. Know what you stand for, believe in, and value; and what your purpose, gifts, and strengths are. Leading with your strengths and gifts allows you to operate in your power (1:13).
Have good character. Power with poor character is not sustained in the long term. We’ve seen big companies fail due to this. Always check your character at the door: be honest, never mislead people, following through on what you said you would, and look out for the best interest of the people. This way power is not bestowed through sheer authority but through respect (2:36).
Be authentic. You can’t be powerful if you’re adapting on some other personality. “Don’t be clever. Be authentic.” Cleverness evokes a sense of superficiality – which is not a powerful trait (3:59). Creating relationships without authenticity, operating on a scripted spiel and pitch wouldn’t win you followers or get you buyers – it will only create doubt and confusion. In opposite, you can gravitate towards a stranger who does not purposefully try to sell you something but is speaking authentically (5:08).
Suspend your own personal agenda. The most powerful people are the ones who are not pursuing a personal agenda but are instead helping and uplifting those around them. Powerful people don’t lead with personal agenda, and sometimes don’t even have one – choosing to reflect the agenda of the company/team they represent (9:20). And when they do, they don’t beat around the bush and just lay it on the table (15:27).
Control Yourself. Power is like energy – it cannot be created nor destroyed, but it can be transferred. Controlling people is an illusion, instead have the discipline to control yourself – your thoughts, emotions, words, and behavior. The thought that by controlling people, they are relinquishing their power to you is a misnomer – you can diminish other people’s power but it can never be taken away. Powerful people knows their power comes from themselves, not other people (16:05).
Be Present. You can’t be powerful if you’re not present. It’s hard to be powerful when you’re in your head thinking about what other people think about you. Sitting in self-pity, self-doubt, insecurity – will not make you powerful (18:45).
You own your results. Whatever circumstance you are in the present, own your results. Don’t blame it on time, money, the weather, or other people. Don’t give up too soon. Stay on something long enough to make it work (19:53).
Relevant Links:
Think & Grow Chick | Achievement tips for ambitious chicks
What 11 Highly Successful People Were Doing in Their 20s | Mic
Power is perceived as this huge thing that outsiders see emanated by an individual, controlling others. The reality is it starts small, from within, and it entails a foundation based on truth, restraint, goodness, and accountability. These are what it takes to be powerful beyond belief.
I hope this episode allows you the true nature of power. If this is an area you are working on, I would like to hear your thoughts. Give me a shout-out on the comments section or email me at charlene@fromcaterpillarstobutterflies.com if there’s anything you want to share or would want to work with me.
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